with it.So anyway ever meet someone and even their stare is untruthful? Its unsteady, they are searching your eyes for something to say but they dont need to say anything cuz you know its going to be bullshit. Yea i did. And you can call me negative or pessimistic but for me theres a vibe you get from people when you meet them and talk to them and if that vibe is telling you uh uh...something aint right here, I try to listen to it. A couple jokers slip through the radar on me but those are those Kryptonite toting bulshitters...hey, cant win em all.
Now, Im sitting across from this person and they are telling me that I am beautiful and they feel like they met the woman of their dreams. (Camera pan to me)
*Crickets*
Ahahahahahahaaaaaa (snorts)
Umm...You met me like 3 days ago my dude...umm...I dont even know what you're expecting me to say but...yea...got nothing.
Like seriously, do you really think that I am that dense and naive to believe that without us having any meaningful conversation, I dont even know your last name nor do you know mine...but you love me? Uh huh.
(Yanks cord from wall as "On The Wings Of Love" comes on to be the soundtrack to this painful exchange) SHUT UP JEFFREY OSBORNE! Aint none here!
Now this is the funny part, this is when Im getting popcorn in my own reality to watch this because its so rich. I decide to indulge him. Ok, you love me, what exactly is it that you love about me? (Lemme get my Chuck Woolery, Im listening face on....Go!!)
Him: *Crickets* Well um, its everything, its your look, your eyes, your mouth, bah-dee
Blah! This story sucks! Im bored.
So its surface stuff. Things on the outside are appealing. Hmm...
Now I could say the same for him. He is a very attractive brotha but I think thats all he is and thats all that has been expected of him or he would've put more than ASSets on the table and expected a sista to gush off just that. I mean dont get me wrong the fact that you are an artist is awesome but dont stand in front of me chest puffed out in the spotlight tellin me you are an artist. AND? Tell me what you write about, what inspires you, why you love music. MAKE me want to know more than what I can already see.
And most of all be truthful. Im not here to marry you or put you before the firing squad so no need to bullshit me or my questions. I mean EVERYONE has lied. I have but gotdamn not about having an ENTIRE family in the cut somewheres! Maybe its me and too much CSI and Law & Order but the shifty eyes always have something to hide. So when he volunteers information on his ex that I can tell is crap, or tries to play priest (well thats not even relevant in today's society) dont get upset when I check you. Bad experiences are some of the best things that can happen to you because they teach you what to look for the next time around. So Im grateful for them making me a wiser woman.
Now back to this dude. So Im totally not feelin it. The more he talks the more angry I get and want to knock the headwrap off his head but Im chill. Surprisingly chill. Cuz seriously, what is it to me if he lies. Im not the girlfriend or wife sitting at home waiting for his cheating ass to come home. He's not problem. So why get upset over it. Im more a less annoyed, because I have ignored calls, refused to go out but...still he bothers me. A man that feels he has to bring a 15 year ol (well he looks 15) sidekick who has portable porn on his laptop and feels bold enough to pull it out in a car and yes a freakin restaurant...is no man to me. GET GROWN MY DUDE, GET M********** GROWN!
Now I went on this adventure with my cuz who made me wish she was wearing a headwrap so I could knock that off too. This guy is obviously shady but because hes putting drinks in your hand that somehow knocks the negative stuff out. Umm... I didn drink anything but OJ so he can have the $4.00 I cost him. I dont need anyone to buy me a drink...especially a $4.00 drink. I appreciated it, said thanks but not necessary. I mean dont let it get out that booty costs $4.00...the lines will form and mayhem will commence. Please. I dont owe you anything.
It saddened me and pissed me off that the fact that this guy drove her around and dropped money on her, he was this great guy that she had to convince me to give the time of day. Umm.. are you his pimp or somethin? No, then be cool. Ive sat with him and Im not interested. Now wheres that damn tro tro, theres a funky armpit waiting for me to take a seat next to it.
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